I started my first blog back in 2011. It was me discovering Blogspot and how to write for the web. I had just started university; I wanted people to know me through the lens of what I liked and cared about. It was the regular trifecta—books, movies and music. Then I switched to writing my impressions on the good or bad things I saw around me, events I attended, the work I was doing at the time, i.e. volunteering, learning, finding my way.
It probably took me a year to start publishing fictional pieces and I enjoyed that part tremendously. I remember a particular piece I wrote about love and daydreaming that was well received. Until one that fateful morning, 3 years later, when I was pitching a project to my very first potential client and he interrupted me, saying: ‘I saw you published an article about lovers waiting on the bedside, that was interesting, haha!’ I took the website down that same day and never looked back. That project had the same fate, too.
In the years that followed, I was hyper vigilant and even reluctant, really, when it came to writing something about myself or even for my business. It had to be either brilliant or important to make the cut. Setting such expectations for myself was not only unhealthy, but unnecessary.
During the early days of the pandemic, I made a small step in a better direction. I was reading a book every two weeks and started posting my reviews on Instagram. It felt good, productive—relaxing my own expectations worked wonders.
In my role today, I focus on people and processes. This implies writing, presenting, facilitating dialogue and establishing connections. My Kolbe A Index results suggest that I’m naturally wired for explaining things and creating systems which, when I’m at my best, makes my work feel easy. But it mostly gets seen by our team’s eyes only.
Every week my business partner and I talk to at least a couple of founders, and it often starts the same: so what do you do? I like to keep it short, like the empathic introvert I am. Some people are surprised that I’m in charge and not my partner, as he’s the obviously capable one. And that’s when it sometimes hits me: I wish they knew me through the lens of what I like and care about.
Looking back, I have made great and beautiful things, and mistakes just as outstanding. And I’m happy to let them percolate, hoping they’d be helpful to a handful of people. Writing, to me, is not a tool to measure self-worth anymore. “You need to claim the events of your life to make yourself yours.” said Anne-Wilson Schaef and I absolutely love it.
I will use this space to share my thoughts on what I create and experience in my everyday life. Here I go!
Special thanks to Jonathan Wold for encouraging me to start writing again.